Relationship fraud

Relationship fraud is also known as romance fraud where a friendship is initiated online and develops to the point where one of the parties believes they are in a serious personal relationship with their new friend. With relationship fraud, the other party is a fraudster who is making a career out of developing relationships with others online and defrauding them of their money.

How does this work? 

People meet on many sites on the internet ranging from dating sites through to social media sites such as Facebook. The reasons people uses the internet to meet others are many, and include seeking a partner, a friend to chat with or even a new friend to meet for coffee.

Profiles on social media and dating sites include a large amount of personal information about the lives of individuals, their likes and dislikes, employment, interests, clubs, sports and personal background. The fraudster will carefully review all this material prior to making the initial approach. They will then develop a strategy which is specifically designed to attract the interest of their target. Many fraudsters use a strategy called mirroring where they reflect the interests and personal life experiences of their intended target in their modified profile.

The photos they use have been stolen off another web site and are designed to appeal to their target. The initial aim of the fraudster is to commence a conversation with their target and encourage them to leave the dating site for an instant message service such as Yahoo chat or Skype.

As the relationship develops, the fraudster monitors the answers of their target and assesses them for an emotional vulnerability they may exploit. They are known to create files on their targets through extensive online searches and record their progress so they may instantly recall their targets background and potential vulnerabilities. The fraudster is usually attempting to defraud many individuals at once so requires the file to recall the personal details and storyline they are using on each individual.

There are many forms of research that shows people form very strong personal relationships over the internet, including through relationship sites, chat rooms and online gaming. Many people interviewed have described the intensity of their online relationship can equal that of a traditional face to face relationship.

It is common for the fraudster to communicate with their target for several months before they first bring money into the conversation. This preparation is deliberate and is a strategy that is successful as after several months, the victim believes they know their new friend very well, and because they have never asked for money, believe they cannot be a fraudster. During this time, the fraudster will be assessing their target for the best opportunity to introduce their strategy.

Persons involved in these crimes have great difficulty extracting themselves from the relationship due to the emotional and financial ties that have been built up. The victim develops a dependency on their new friend and often ends up trusting them more than they do friends and family. Many fraudsters use a strategy called “divide and conquer” where they identify who their victim’s personal support network is and slowly works at breaking down that relationship and the trust they have built up over many years.

To assist in the fraud and advance the relationship with their target, the fraudster will often use their friends and family to play various roles in the fraud, even using their children to speak to the target.

Relationship frauds often end with the victim losing all their assets as well as borrowing large sums of money to send to their online friend. Once they realise they have been defrauded, they struggle to understand that every word spoken by their friend was a lie and they have been deceived from the time of the initial contact. This communication may have been over several years and involved thousands on online and phone conversations. Subsequently the victim has been emotionally defrauded as well as financially.

Whilst the thought that a person may send all their money to a person they are in a relationship with who they have never met seems unrealistic, this is one of the fastest growing crimes being committed online. The financial rewards to the criminals are significant and they have identified that an emotionally vulnerable person is susceptible to a well-prepared role.

Examples of common strategies used by the criminals in relationship frauds include:

• US servicemen wishing to travel to Australia with a large sum of money
• Engineer or businessman who seeks money to finalise business before travelling to Australia
• Australian resident overseas returning home needed assistance
• Person they have developed a relationship with has a serious accident and requires lifesaving surgery. The victim may be contacted directly by the person playing the role of the doctor asking for money. They say that if you do not send money for the operation, then your friend will die.
• Unable to communicate via Skype because their computer is broken, internet connection is too slow or their computer has no webcam. Alternatively, computer programs exist where a fraudster can create an online image of a person that can react to commands such as waving a hand, standing up or smiling.
• Many attempts are made for the person to travel to Australia (each at the victim’s expense), however they are never able to make it. Many victims have attended their airport waiting for their friend to arrive however they do not.
• Explain they need financial assistance to bring a sum of money or diamonds/ gold to Australia that can be used to repay the victim and start their new life together.

In each fraud, the promise is made that upon payment of a fee, charge, tax etc., that will allow the person to travel to Australia and commence their new life with their Australian friend. The QPS Financial and Cyber Crime Group have been investigating these crimes since 2005 and are unaware of any instance from the thousands of people identified sending money to people overseas in relationship frauds of having their new partner arrive in the country. In many of these instances, the complainant has ignored the advice of Police, their friends, family and work colleagues, resulting in the loss of a large percentage of or total value of their wealth.

Of further concern, some victims have travelled to foreign countries to meet their friend and taken large sums of money with them.

A specific warning sign of relationship fraud is the delay between communication. The victim makes a comment and there is a significant delay in response. This may be because they are carefully considering a reply to the comment of their victim or they are defrauding several people at the same time and whilst you are making your comment, they are also defrauding another person. Sometimes the fraudster gets confused and types a reply to the wrong person which is totally out of context of the communication or calls the victim the wrong name.

How do I protect myself?

• Understand no matter how long you communicate with a person online, you only know what they want you to know.
• Never send money to people you meet on the internet. Professional fraudsters specialise in defrauding people through relationship fraud.
• Be wary if they do not have a web cam where you can verify the person looks like they represent in their online profile. Numerous excuses exist for not using a web cam such as the computer not having one, they cannot locate a USB connected web cam through to the local internet connection is too slow for a webcam connection.
• Seek independent advice about your new friend from trusted friends, family or professionals such as police, lawyer etc. Be prepared to accept their advice and not simply seek their agreement. The fraudster wants to break your relationship with friends and family so they have control of their victim and their finances.
• Relationship fraudsters online have many excuses why they cannot meet you in person to advance the relationship. If you cannot meet your new online friend within a week at a safe public location, be very aware you may be dealing with a relationship fraudster.
• Trust any uncomfortable suspicions you have.